E-MAILS FROM AROUND
As the buffoons on both sides attempt to thwart "the will of the
people" by circumventing the Constitution, it is a wonderful measure
of the resiliency of America that, in this crucial time, we have found
humor in so many aspects of this situation. Here are some samples from
both sides. Actually, most of them are from Conservatives. Liberals seem
to be an incredibly humorless lot.
Thanks to everyone who contributed to this summary. I probably should
have put these up in the order received but I started just tucking them
in wherever they seemed to fit and it got out of hand. If you want to see
if your stuff is here, you will just have to scroll down until you
find it, ....but thanks again.
November 11th was Veterans' Day. I hope you took the time to say,"Thanks"
to a serviceman or a vet.
[Guess this applies to Republicans only. The Democrats don't seem to
know they exist. ;-( ]
Take a stroll back in time through the e-mails concerning events
that occurred in Florida and elsewhere as the Democrats tried desperately
to steal the 2000 presidential election.
Now, Bill Clinton refuses to retire gracefully and is leading the
charge as they attempt to delegitimize the Bush Presidency by suggesting
that Gore won the popular vote and the election was stolen from
THEM. They were undoubtedly assured by the most skilled vote stealers in
the land that the fix was in and Florida was theirs. No wonder they are
mad. They thought the election was rigged and lost anyway.
This site has become very graphic
intensive. It may take a while for all of the pictures to load. Be patient.
They are worth the wait.
Democrats have had it with dear old Bill.
the history books say? "What a despicable bastard !"
was written by a Lehigh Grad and former
Attack Sub Lt.
Bethlehem, PA - Editorial
In another ninety-five days a new President will be sworn in
as the forty-third President of the United States, thus ending
the most disgraceful and scandal-ridden Presidency of the
past two hundred and twenty-four years of our nation. This
gives cause for a celebration and a reflection upon things
that I never, ever again will have to be witness to.
For those West Point, Naval Academy and Air Force Academy
friends of mine, I recognize the pain that you in particular
have endured these past eight years with this loathsome
Commander-In-Chief in the White House. To my honest,
hard working friends and family members who value honesty
and integrity among our elected officials, you have endured
more than United States citizens should ever have to endure.
But alas, in ninety-six days, the thoroughly disgusting and
shameful occupant at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. will be cast
aside and hopefully forgotten by the nation that he has so
In order to celebrate his upcoming departure I have drafted
the following piece which I have appropriately entitled,
Never again will I have to watch Bill Clinton walk down the
steps of Air Force One while a proud Marine in full dress
uniform crisply salutes him, ..... a Marine who fully
comprehends duty, honor, and country in a way that the man he is saluting
Never again will I have to watch Bill Clinton on Veterans' Day
place a wreath on the hallowed Tomb of the Unknown Soldier
while he dramatically bites his lower lip in an effort to appear
that he cares or even appreciates what this place is all about.
A place where truly brave men and women who personally paid the ultimate
price for freedom are forever remembered.
Never again will I have to watch Bill Clinton on national
television wag his finger at each and every American and
unconscionably lie to us.
Never again will I have to witness Bill Clinton sending young men and women
of the military into frivolous but life-threatening action to deflect
attention from the personal scandals that confront him at home.
Never again will I see Bill Clinton's name on a ballot.
Never again will I be embarrassed by Bill Clinton's disgusting
and abhorrent behavior with a twenty-four year old woman in the Oval Office.
Never again will Bill Clinton have the power to conduct an eight
year "social experiment" with the United States Armed Forces, driving the
best out while systematically crippling the overall capability, effectiveness
and morale of the remaining troops.
Never again will I have to be embarrassed to say Bill Clinton
represents me, a proud citizen of the United States of America.
Never again will Bill Clinton be able to sell the historic Lincoln
bedroom to the highest bidder, the Chinese, felons, and other
Never again will I have to watch Bill Clinton departing church
with his equally pitiful wife, clutching an oversized Bible in his hand
as if to make us believe that he has repented for any of his misdeeds.
Never again will I have to see a joint session of Congress rise
to their feet in the Capital building when the deceitful and
shameless Bill Clinton enters the chamber.
Never again will I have to refer to Bill Clinton as "President of
the United States."
May God Bless America
This is a letter I sent to MSNBC
this morning. If you didn't believe that
the Dems are trying to steal
votes, you should have heard this guy. I could
have accepted Gore last tuesday,
but no longer..........
(Name of active duty officer withheld)
I was watching your morning discussion segment when
moderator read a part of a Los Angeles Times article
how Democrats were instructing their people on how
look for "dimpled or scratched chads" that would
favor AL Gore and "keep your mouth shut" when
they saw the same marks on a Bush chad. When
this, one of the democrats made the comment that this
a "perfectly acceptable strategy". I hope I'm
not alone in thinking that this is one of the most
un-American statements I've ever heard in my life
smacks of Communist rhetoric.
These people just don't get it.
As an American
serviceman, I expect that the votes should show what
citizens of this country want, and it makes me sick
think that these people are only interested in the
of those that voted for their candidate.
(Name of active duty officer withheld)
January 20, 2001
Our Eight Year National Nightmare
is Finally Over!
Pray for the Success of our
On his last day in office Bill Clinton granted
pardons to Susan Mc Dougal and others involved in Whitewater and other
Arkansas misdeeds (all people who could have hurt him personally if he
had not struck a deal with the Special Prosecutor Robert Ray) but he did
NOT pardon Web Hubbell ...... The only conclusion one can draw is that
Web knows things that can still hurt Hillary.
My God! He is at Andrews Air
Force Base giving another speech.....
He will hog the cameras as
long as the networks let him.
Give it up Bill ........ this
is George W. Bush's day. Get the hell out of WASHINGTON.
January 19, 2001
Well, We may get him out of Washington .....
or maybe not. Today, he copped a plea bargain so he won't be prosecuted
and won't go to prison. Too bad.
And he got on TV again, didn't
January 18, 2001 Prime Time
Hey, it's wonderful me again. I know I
have no class , giving this goodbye speech right in the middle of Dubya's
moment, but these stupid networks will put me on the air while I'm sitting
on the John if I ask them to.
January 6, 2001
Whew! It is finally really
The Congressional Black Caucus tried once
again to steal the election by attempting to get Florida's votes thrown
out. One by one, they complained, but lacking a supporting signature from
any member of the Senate, the complaints were overruled. Not one Senator
was willing to prolong the Certification any longer by supporting any of
the complaints. The vote of the Electoral College was certified and Bush
/ Cheney were declared the winners. Now the fat lady can REALLY sing.
Meanwhile, using the Freedom of Information
Act, some of the Media, and others with an agenda, will be re-counting,
counting, counting until it comes out their way.
There is an upside.
Freedom of Information is not Free
and those counties will make them pay through the nose for assistance from
County employees and use of their facilities during the counting.
DECEMBER 18, 2000
So far, all attempts to steal the election have failed.
The Electoral College votes have been cast. The final irony is that after
all of the attempts by Democrat operatives to get Republican Electors to
switch their votes, one Democrat Elector in the District of Columbia
just couldn't bring herself to vote for Gore and abstained. She said it
was a protest vote over some situation in the District of Columbia. Yeah,
HERE THEY ARE
AND THE NEW FIRST
George W. Bush
And the Veep-Elect and
Dick and Lynne Cheney
Peace On Earth And Good Will To All Men
.... and Women, Too!
A Christmas card sent from a Democrat to
his Republican friends:
The election is over,
the results are known,
The will of the people
has clearly been shown.
Let's forget the quarrels
and show by our deeds,
We will give our new
leader all the help that he needs.
So let's all get together,
and let bitterness pass,
I'll hug your elephant
and you kiss my ass.
[Who said the Democrats are a humorless lot. :-) ]
DECEMBER 19, 2000
Today, Al Gore met with President Elect George W. Bush to brief him
on the world situation. The meeting lasted about 8 minutes.
Guess that's all the time Gore needed to tell Bush everything HE
The cruelest cut of all
(AP) AL GORE HAS WON THE ELECTION ..... for District Director
of the Marion Soil and Water Conservation Board in Salem,
Ore. No one
ran for the post, so write-in votes determined the winner.
Gore won with
23 of the 4,570 votes cast, easily beating
George W. Bush, who also got
a few votes. "Voters don't understand
what it means when they write in a
silly name," said Marion County Clerk Al Davidson. "But
it's their right, and
it's their tax dollars that pay for it."
The Vice President cannot actually take the job, however,
since to serve,
"you have to own or manage land in the zone," Davidson
said. Gore actually
came in second, but vote winner Donald Duck was disqualified
because he's an
Which is something no one has ever said about
December 16, 2000
Gore Forces are Still
Trying to Steal the Election
Al Gore conceded, but he did that once before and reneged.
The really frightening thing is the way Democrat operatives are working
nation wide to try to get Republican Electoral College Electors to change
their allegiance and vote for Gore. Yesterday, I spoke to an attorney,
a friend of one of the Florida Electors, who told me that the Elector had
received tens of thousands of e-mails urging him to vote for Gore. Private
investigators are digging into the private lives of Electors, all over
the country, trying to find an affair or some shady activity that the Elector
would not want made public. These operatives are seeking to blackmail Electors
into changing their votes.
There is a razor thin margin of victory in the Electoral College and
less than a handful of votes would be enought to accomplish a coup.
It ain't over til its over and it won't really be over until the Electoral
There is at least one semi-funny Liberal
out there and here is his contribution.
December 14, 2000
BREAKING NEWS: GOD OVERRULES SUPREME
Bush to be smitten later today.
In a stunning development this morning, God
invoked the "one nation,
under God" clause of the Pledge of Allegiance
to overrule last night's
Supreme Court decision that handed the White
House to George Bush.
"I'm not sure where the Supreme Court gets
off," God said this morning
on a rare Today Show appearance, "but I'm
sure as hell not going to lie
back and let Bush get away with this B S."
"I've watched analysts argue for weeks now
that the exact vote count in
Florida 'will never be known.'
Well, I'm God and I DO know exactly who
voted for whom. Let's cut to the chase:
Gore won Florida by exactly
[Editor's Note: That
is precisely the number the "fixers"told Gore he
would win by but they
goofed in not negating enough Bush votes.]
Shocking political analysts and pundits,
God's unexpected verdict
overrules the official Electoral College
tally and awards Florida to Al
giving him a 289-246 victory. The Bush campaign
is analyzing God's
Word for possible grounds for appeal.
"God's ruling is a classic over-reach," argued
Bush campaign strategist
Jim Baker. "Clearly, a divine intervention
in a U.S. Presidential
Election is unprecedented, unjust, and goes
against the Constitution of
the State of Florida."
"Jim Baker's a jackass," God responded. "He's
got some surprises ahead
of him, let me tell you. HOT ones, if you
know what I mean."
God, who provided the exact vote counts for
every Florida precinct,
explained that bad balloting machinery and
voter confusion were no
grounds to give the White House to "an idiot."
"Look, only 612 people in Palm Beach County
voted for Buchanan. Get
real! The rest meant to vote for Gore. Don't
believe me? I'll name them:
Anderson, Pete; Anderson, Sam, Jr.; Arthur,
James; Barnhardt, Ron..."
Our Lord then went on to note that he was
displeased with George W.Bush's
prideful ways and announced that he
would officially smite him today.
In an act of wrath unlike any reported since
the Book of Job, God
will take all of Bush's goats and livestock,
strip him of his wealth
and possessions, sell his family into slavery,
force the former
presidential candidate into hard labor in
a salt mine, and afflict him
with deep boils.
Dick Cheney will reportedly receive leprosy.
Hey, Not so fast. I think
I found one more for Gore.
DECEMBER 12, 2000 10:45
In the words of the immortal
"It ain't over 'til
Al, Its over.
George W. Bush will
be our Next President
Here comes the fat lady,
ready to sing.
Al Gore rushes to head
It's really NOT your day.
DECEMBER 12, 2000
The United States Supreme Court Has
Spoken and the American People Have been wrung through the wringer again.
The court has reversed the Florida Supreme Court Decision requiring a recount
because of no consistent standards for counting in all of the Florida counties
but the case was remanded back to the Florida Court to do "something" about
that in a manner consistant with this decision.
It does not seem possible to come
close to meeting this in the time remaining.
It is back in the hands of the Florida
Supreme Court and who knows what
mischief that coven of liberals can
concoct in the next few days.
The good news: For now, the manual
recount is stopped dead in its tracks.
Isn't it amazing the lengths to which hypocrite Al Gore will go. He
is letting surrogates handle the last ditch suits in Seminole and Martin
Counties and is pretending to distance himself from them. Why? Because
he is out there on TV daily repeating the mantra that "every vote should
be counted" while these suits are trying to deprive roughly
25,000 citizens of their votes when there was no problem with their ballots.
in both trials has shown that both Democrats and Republican "operatives"
(love that word....it sounds so sinister) added missing voter ID numbers
to the applications for absentee ballots. The Dems did it in their party
headquarters before delivery to the Canvassing board. The Republicans did
it by removing the applications from the Canvassing room, correcting them
by adding the missing numbers and then returning them. The Dems are trying
to put a criminal spin on the latter. Gore is praying for
just one judge who will see it his way.
Give it up Al.
Today is December 7th,
the anniversary of A Day That Will Live in Infamy, ... the date of the
Japananese sneak attack on Pearl Harbor.
We should ALL be
doing some praying today ..... praying that three Florida Courts do not
make this a Second Day That Will Live In Infamy.
Two Florida Circuit Courts did the right thing and did NOT throw out
the absentee ballots of voters whose ballot applications were subject to
irregularities that did not compromise the ballots themselves.
But on Dec. 8th, a day that will truly
live in infamy, the liberal activist Florida Supreme Court in a
4 to 3 split decision, thumbed its nose at the Florida Legislature and
the US Supreme Court, awarded to Gore, votes that arrived AFTER the Courts
OWN deadline, and ordered a recount of "undervoted" ballots statewide.
They did not order a recount of ALL votes. This selective recount is
a fishing expedition hoping to "find" more votes for Gore.
There is no honor is this Florida Supreme Court ....... NONE!!!!!!
Except Chief Justice Wells. God bless him for not knuckling under
to his liberal colleagues.
OOPS! The U.S. Supreme Court stopped
the recount. Sorry, Al.
December 6, 2000
You may be interested in this Letter to the Editor. It was in the San
Diego Union Tribune on December 6, 2000. Vice Presidential candidate
Sen. Joseph Lieberman had recently asked the question, "What will
we tell our children if every vote is not counted?"
Here is the response of one citizen:
"As a former teacher, I have been concerned about Joe Lieberman's
question, "What will we tell our children?"
"What we should, and must, tell our children is that if they fail
to mark the right answer on an exam, or do not fill in the entire test,
they will not get credit for their answers. If they do it often enough
and if they
do not ask for help or read the directions properly, they will
fail. We should tell them that when they are older and move to Florida,
they must fully read their ballot and remove the entire chad and not keep
an entire nation waiting because of their mistakes. We must also teach
them to read and read well, to play by the rules and expect a favorable
outcome. Teaching them to make excuses for their mistakes has led
to a society of victims unable to take responsibility."
"The real destroyer of the
liberties of the people is he who spreads among them bounties, donations,
and benefits." Plutarch
Some news items that have been overshadowed
by the election snafu:
Coca-Cola announced today that, starting immediately, all cans of soda
destined for Palm Beach County, Florida will be clearly stamped on
bottom "OPEN AT OTHER END!"
The Florida Department of Transportation has finally come up with a
reason for all the intersection accidents in Palm Beach County, Florida...
one knows what the arrows mean!
Newly released statistic: 87% of the 'blue hairs' in Palm Beach
County, Florida used to be blondes.
A recount has been ordered of all bingo card winnings over the past
five years in Palm Beach County, Florida.
It was a simple mistake in Palm Beach County, Florida. After all,
names 'Gore and Buchanan' look almost exactly alike when printed out.
There is already a book out called "Voting For Dummies". In order
it to sell in Palm Beach County, Florida, they'll have to first teach
of the people to read.
Everyone in Palm Beach County, Florida believes in the Ten
Commandments but 78% of them also believe you can choose five of them.
Doctors have discovered the problem with Palm Beach County, Florida
voters... 68% of them are dyslexic. They thought the word "vote"
The problem with the ballot in Palm Beach County, Florida stems from
the fact that it is largely a retirement area. 77% of the retirees
use to be
That's the segment who asked for another chance to vote...they thought
they were filing an appeal.
Thought you might want this for your Election page.
And I will wet my
diaper if I don't get it.
Whats the difference between Al Gore and a puppy.
After 6 weeks, a puppy opens its eyes and stops whining.
Thought you would like this one.
THERE IS COMPELLING STATISTICAL
EVIDENCE OF MASSIVE BALLOT TAMPERING AND VOTE COUNTING FRAUD IN PALM BEACH
THE STATISTICAL ANALYSIS IS TOO LONG
TO PUT ON THIS PAGE AND IT IS HEAVY READING BUT STICK WITH IT. THE ODDS
AGAINST THIS HAPPENING BY CHANCE, IN ONE, MUCH LESS TWO SUCCESSIVE, PRESIDENTIAL
RACES ARE ASTRONOMICAL
CLICK HERE FOR
THE FULL STORY
If The President
Find Out Who He Is.
From an e-mail from
Medina, Saudi Arabia:
They have a saying here
that people get the government they deserve.
Al Gore is grasping for anything that would
make him president. You know the fight is almost
the only factions now offering you assistance
and United Van Lines.
A Florida man has agreed to pay over $7000 in
fines for speeding
through 705 tollbooths without paying.
He was originally accused of running
503 tollbooths but asked the Palm Beach County
Canvassing Board for a recount
and gained 202 more.
Subject: Al Gore Has Subpoenaed Santa Clause...
It is rumored that Al Gore has subpoenaed Santa Clause over some
"irregularities" that have been found on Christmas list handling
After the recent Florida Supreme Court ruling ordered a 3rd election
recount, Gore has allegedly said that "checking a list, and checking
cannot possibly discern the true wishes of the children.
And the part about "who has been naughty, and who has been nice" is
clearly a value judgment that does not take into account the circumstance
surrounding said malfeasance.
Santa's list was obtained under the "Freedom of Information Act" and
immediately a boiler room call center was formed to call all children
see if items listed on Santa's list were, in fact, the true desires
Several indicated that they had intended to ask for Sony Playstations,
and instead had checked off Nintendo 64. Many of the children
emotionally distraught and felt that the entire Christmas letter writing
was outdated and "hard to understand".
In reviewing the post marks of the Christmas letters, it was found by
Democrat Canvassing officials that certain letters, particularly those
that requested "G.I. Joe" dolls were not properly postmarked.
(obviously from Republican children) were thrown out.
Democrat officials have asked that Palm Beach, Broward and Dade County
children, each be contacted in person and have their requests reviewed
Santa Claus indicated that there was not possibly enough time to get
each child by December 25.
The Florida Supreme Court is now considering the postponement of
Christmas until December 30th, to allow for a "full and accurate" list
First there were swinging chads, then hanging chads and now we
hear there can be buildups of CLOGGED chads. Doesn't that sound
something that belongs on a country music show or on the FRAUD page
Far Side Goes to Floriduh.
FAT LADY, TO COME TO FLORIDA
Tuesday November 28, 2000
Vice President Al Gore is contesting the election
in Florida based on "incomplete and inaccurate" vote tallies.
Last night, whimpering Al Gore, in a
nationally televised speech, cried about
10,000 votes in Miami Dade County that were
not counted at all. This is another of his brazen lies. These ballots were
counted ... TWICE. They just weren't hand counted his
Here are the realities of the nation-wide
Voter error invalidated more than 2 million
ballots nationwide .
By Audrey Hudson
THE WASHINGTON TIMES
The uncounted ballots in Florida — which have played a key role in
Democratic challenges — are just a drop in the bucket of ballots
dismissed nationwide because of voter error, say political observers.
An estimated 180,000 votes were dismissed in Florida — out of 6.1 million
votes cast — because of improper voting procedures.
However, more than 2 million ballots were tossed out in all 50 states and
also will not be counted, said Curtis Gans, director of the Committee for
the Study of the American Electorate.
Mr. Gans estimates that between 1 percent and 1.8 percent of votes cast
— or 2.1million to 2.8 million ballots — were eliminated nationally.
"These are people who by one form or another did not accurately do their
ballot, and it was thereby thrown out for one reason or another,"
Mr. Gans said.
(So, another exaggeration exposed. Al Gore claims to have won the popular
vote but unless these two million plus are "counted" we won't
know if this is true or not, will we?)
In Nassau County, Florida, as in the
rest of the state, there was a mandatory machine recount.
Gore is now contesting the vote in that county
because he got more votes in the first count than in the
and he wants the FIRST count to stand.
Yes, he wants to pick and choose among the
counts and pick the one that suits him.
Heck, That's fair isn't it?
Du uuuu UUUUU uh.
The wisdom of the Founding
Fathers grows more apparent by the day.
Sorry Al, but nowhere
in the Constitution does it say a loser has to concede.
So cry all you want
..... but don't do it on my TV.
Tuesday November 28, 2000
Suggested Last Minute Instructions
the Hand Counters in Florida
(In Case You Get a Chance to Count One More
Given the recent Florida Supreme Court decision
allowing for manual recounts to continue,
the following guidelines when assessing the
1. Dimpled Chad for Al Gore: Clearly,
intended to cast a ballot for Al Gore, but
fully penetrate the paper due to being too
not receiving badly needed prescription medication
because they can't afford it. COUNT
THIS VOTE FOR AL
2. Hole punched for Pat Buchanan:
Since nobody in
his right mind would vote for Pat Buchanan,
was obviously confused by the butterfly ballot.
Further, only Democrats would be confused
ballot so COUNT THIS VOTE FOR AL GORE.
3. Dimpled Chad for George Bush:
voters started to vote for George Bush, then
change of heart and decided not to.
COUNT THIS VOTE
FOR AL GORE.
4. Both Al Gore and George Bush hole
most certainly happened here was that the
intended to cast their ballots for Al Gore,
punched the hole. Then, spying George
Bush's name and
realizing he would take away their social
the voters became enraged and stabbed the
their stylus. COUNT THIS VOTE FOR AL
5. No vote indicated: Voters were
so worried about
accidentally voting for Pat Buchanan they
to risk it, and didn't vote at all.
they figured it was only common sense that
vote for Al Gore--who else would they vote
assumed it was silly to have to go through
effort to punch a hole for somebody.
COUNT THIS VOTE FOR AL GORE.
6. Hole punched for Ralph Nader:
Look, the only
reason these people voted for Nader was because
assumed Gore would win. Imagine their
horror the next
day when they discovered they may have given
margin of victory! Since these voters
did not want to
vote for Bush, COUNT THIS VOTE FOR AL GORE.
7. Military ballots: Hey, if these
people don't even
have the ambition to get to the polling places,
right do they have to vote? DISQUALIFY
7. Hole punched for George Bush:
Our poor, confused
citizens clearly didn't understand what lay
best interests. Our task here is to
INTENT, which was to vote for the candidate
likely to provide additional, badly needed
programs. COUNT THIS VOTE FOR AL GORE.
(--copyright 2000 W. Bruce Cameron)
A proposed revision to the rules of golf is being sought in
Florida which will replace the traditional call of "FORE".
Once a player has hit an errant shot he will be allowed
to call "GORE"
while the ball is still in flight. He can then
replace the ball in the
same spot and hit it again. The player can do
this until he is
satisfied the ball is going where he intended to hit it in
the first place.
This will cause the time of play to be extended until such
the player can claim the hole.
If by chance the ball hangs or is leaning on the lip of the
hole, it should be counted as good since that was the golfer's
This revision is causing some consternation to the PGA but
say it is only fair. A test of this new rule was recently
played out in an
exclusive club in Palm Beach County, Florida and the first hole
took 7 days to complete...
Let 'em go, let 'em go!!!
As you are probably aware, if the voting results in Florida
stand as they are now, George W. Bush will be our next
President. This will have catastrophic results in our vital,
no, indispensable entertainment industry. Barbara Streisand,
Martin Sheen, Susan Sarandon, Whoopie Goldberg, Alec Baldwin,
among many others have sworn to leave the country if George W.
Bush is elected President. And this is where YOU can help. We
need volunteers to help pack and to load moving vans.
We also need volunteers to provide airfare for these
irreplaceable national treasures so they can relocate before
they can change their minds. For the cost of a small SUV you
can sponsor one of these celebrities and their unfortunate
relocation. You will know that your efforts are helping when
you receive postcards, letters and pictures from your chosen
"refugee" as they learn to become a useful citizen in the
third world country of their choosing.
You will help, won't you?? It costs so little, but it means
so much!!! Call 1-800-deport-a-lib. Operators are standing by.
Major credit cards are accepted.
Interesting election statistics:
Population of counties won by Gore: 127 million
Population of counties won by Bush: 143 million
Square miles of country won by Gore: 580,000
Square miles of country won by Bush: 2,427,000
States won by Gore: 19
States won by Bush: 29
Average Murder per 100,000 residents in counties won by Gore:
Average Murder per 100,000 residents in counties won by Bush:
Palm Beach County
But Seriously Folks
To the Honorable Supreme Court Justices of the State of Florida,
Chapter 102 of the Florida Statutes. Section 112 is directed
at county election boards, and reads, "Returns must be filed by 5
p.m. on the 7th day following the ... general election."
The same section backs up this mandatory deadline by requiring the Secretary
of State to fine each county election board member $200 for each
day the returns are late. Even the definitionally-challenged Bill Clinton
would have a hard time avoiding the clear meaning of this provision.
But wait, it gets even clearer. Section 111 is directed at the
state election board and reads, "If the county returns are not received
by the Department of State by 5 p.m. of the seventh day following an election,
all missing counties shall be ignored, and the results shown by the
returns on file shall be certified."
So what is the law in this case? A specific requirement (backed
up by mandatory fines) that counties certify their returns by 5:00 p.m.
on the seventh day after an election (Nov. 14) and a specific requirement
that the state ignore the counties that do not. Not only is each provision
clear by itself, but is in perfect harmony with the other.
That's "what the law is" in this case. The facts to which this
law must be applied are that some counties did not want to comply with
the deadline because they were doing manual recounts after two machine
counts had already been completed. Rather than being required to
finish manual recounts by the
deadline, they said the deadline must be waived for their manual recounts.
It is time to put partisan politics behind you and uphold the
Rule of Law according to your sworn oaths. "We, the People" DEMAND it of
you. Nothing less than one of the cornerstones of American Liberty is at
stake here. America is in crisis and if you allow the Democrats to steal
this election through chicanery, you risk seeing America destroyed by the
first true civil war. Don't think it can't happen. America is culturally
divided to a disastrous degree. Please do your duty honestly and do not
attempt to legislate from the Bench. Florida law is clear and unambiguous.
This email is being widely distributed across America and we
shall be watching closely. Bring a legimate closure to this election--for
"We, the People" will not accept a fraudulent administration.
The Florida Supreme Court
Chief Justice Charles T. Wells
Justice Leander J. Shaw, Jr.
Justice Major B. Harding
Justice R. Fred Lewis
Justice Harry Lee Anstead
Justice Barbara J. Pariente
Justice Peggy A. Quince
General e-mail for the Florida Supreme Court is: email@example.com
These are the liberal Justices of the
Florida Supreme Court who approved the selective recount that put YOU,
FLORIDA, and the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA through more than a month
of unnecessary turmoil .
Harry Lee Anstead
Barbara J. Pariente
R. Fred Lewis
Peggy A. Quince
Post these names on your refrigerator.
In a future election, when you see these
names on your ballot next to the question, "Shall these justices of the
Supreme Court be retained?"Vote a resounding , "NO!"
( If you are in a county that uses
punch cards, make sure the chad is punched out completely and not left
hanging. Let there be no misunderstanding as to the "intent of the voter.")
Want to show your support for Florida Secretary of State, Kathrine
Harris? Her e-mail address is:
Monday November 27, 2000
Clinton refuses to release the $5,300,000
set aside for the transition team and will not give Bush the keys to the
7:30 Sunday November 26, 2000
From the Gore camp:
Whine, Whine Whine,
Do Over !
Do Over !
Do Over !
I Wasn't Ready
(And, Al, by you childish behavior you have proven that you will NEVER
be ready to be president.)
Thou shalt not steal elections
Al Gore, Commander 'n Thief?
Not if MY vote counts.
This guy put too much work into this one to hold it any longer.
Subject: Breaking News!!
I just heard breaking news that CNN is revisiting the outcome
of the CIVIL WAR - it appears that it was too close to call and
the South may still have a chance.
Documents were found that support the fact that some people joined the
wrong side - apparently they weren't aware that their states were part
of the South and they were fighting for the North.
The line between the North and South was "just too confusing" for
A recount of all the battles is being simulated with new
populations via computer to see who would have actually won.
Right now it's just too close to call.
It doesn't matter who votes,
it only matters who counts the votes. Josef Stalin
YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THAT THOSE OLD LADIES IN PALM BEACH CAN PLAY 15
CARDS SIMULTANEOUSLY - BUT CAN'T PUNCH A BALLOT?!!"
Remember the joke that was making the rounds prior to the election
that stated that due to
the larger than usual turnout expected this year Republicans would
vote on Tues. the 7th and Democrats
would vote on Wednesday the 8th?
Well you might have known it. On the morning the
8th, 6 Democrats showed up looking to vote.
And now they are claiming foul and want to run the election all over
again. As Bob Ripley would say
"Believe It Or Not"
Another election question, if this is the uprising of the masses
to take back the government,
did Clinton and Gore miss the boat by failing to make gun owners and
soldiers lose their vote?
Did Washington's troops at Valley Forge file absentee ballots?(always
good for school kids).
The Japanese are sending us 50,000,000 cases of viagra.
They've heard the whole country is having trouble with our election.
Beach County: We put the "duh" in Florida.
Here's a scary
tried to fudge the last census, suggesting that we should do a computer
simulation instead of actually counting people because some people might
not get counted. Sound familiar?
If Al Gore wins
this one, by the time the next election rolls around, people will not have
to vote. A computer will divine the intentions of each registered voter
and vote for him. No need to vote and no need for a recount.
ALGORithms will concur on the winner .... and guess who it will be.
It Is A Mistake To Call Palm
Beach Voters Dumb.
They Were Told To Punch Hole
They Punched Hole 2.
Just go into any supermarket parking
lot in Palm Beach County.
Should anyone who is unable to follow
an eight foot yellow arrow on black asphalt
be permitted to vote?
Did you wonder election night why we listen to news
anchors after they panicked
when subtracting one number from another, usually giving up and asking
off camera to help?
Did you think that northern newspersons sound foolish
saying "you all", I mean
"y'all" is bad, but at least it goes with grits?
Did Bush make a mistake with transition announcements,
or was it a plan to get his
cabinet members out to the public in case of a revote? Colin Powell
in his cabinet would
Did Christopher ruin his image in history by overstating
the activity of the Secretary
of State and relating it to fascist and totalitarian governments?
Every notice Gore tilts his head everytime he lies,
might be the pain stops him
If ballots are missing, will the legal teams hand
count the gator vote, hope, hope.
Will there be a shortage of turkeys around the country
with so many attorneys in
For the record, the hurricane force winds should
not be considered a natural disaster,
what do you expect with so many hot air bags in one place, Florida
should know how
to handle them.
This years best Christmas gift, Florida lets the
third hand-recount be done by the legal
teams, should take 7 courts and two weeks per vote.
New law for Florida, no out-of-staters are allowed
to come to the state just to see us do
counts. Anytime the population goes over 1% of lawyers, any more
entering must pay
an air pollution charge and will be limited to 35 words per minute.
Bush, mad enough to pop a blood vessel or is it a
Gore has yet to go after the currently dead, those
that voted and have since died,
if the state allows revote, what about those votes, after all, most
of the people that
voted for Gore likely had a heart attack after thinking he might get
in, and died. If a corpse
can run for Governor of Missouri seems only fair that the dead should
get a revote in Florida.
To speed up the recount, maybe we should only count
people that said they voted
twice in error and are Democrats, since they are the only voters
admitting that they
are too stupid to understand a ballot.
Ralph Nader should get a recount, for all the
people that put the card in upside-down.
Now we know why the Liberal Florida Supreme Court wants to wait until
Monday to decide if the recounted votes will be accepted. This gives the
recounting counties a target. When the absentee ballots are all counted,
they will know how many Gore votes must be "found" to beat Bush.
If they "find" enough, they will be included.
And the National election will have been stolen.
This letter was sent to and published by the St. Augustine Record.
The Democrat strategy became very clear
when they sent a team of
their dirtiest players to Florida and announced their
initiate law suits even before the recount had started.
The Democrats don't care a whit
about the "will of the people" in
Palm Beach County, or anywhere else. They have only
one agenda here, ...
get Al Gore into the White House, whatever it takes.
When the Electoral College meets in December,
only delegations from
states that have certified the results will be permitted
A state delegation
cannot be certified as long as the outcome of the
election is tied up in the courts.
If the Florida count can be tied up
until all of the litigation
has run its course, the entire state will
have been disenfranchised and
Al Gore wins by default.
Here is a scary thought , if the
Democrats succeed in winning the
White House by this strategy, the stage will be set
to litigate outcomes
and tie up enough close-vote states' Electoral College
votes to steal
the White House again in the future. The Dems may
be there forever.
And, to emphasize the point, this just
Here is the latest scenario.
George Bush was elected on 11-7-00.
He was elected again on 11-18-00.
He will be elected again on 11/20 or 21/
However, Gore supporters will appeal to the U.S. Supreme Court.
It was long since decided that no president may be elected
from protests around Palm Beach County
One more recount now appears to be needed in Palm Beach County.
Since one outwardly partisan member of the team recounting votes there
has been seen be several individuals (who have filed sworn affidavits)
putting Bush ballots in the pile of Gore ballots. The Gore pile must
recounted to make certain no Bush ballots "accidentally" found their
the Gore pile.
Here's yet another
outsider sticking his nose into the Florida voting process.
I am fed up with seeing outsider Senator
Bob Kerry (Dem. Nebraska) mentioning the poor weak 85 year old woman who
didn't have the strength to punch out a chad.
It has been a standard tactic of Gore to
drag out "someone" to prove a point . . . . so make him identify
and drag out this poor weak old woman and let her demonstrate to a panel
of geriatric specialists that she is truly unable to punch out a chad.
. . . And let her vote a full sample ballot.
I don't believe she exists. She is another
Gore team fabrication.
The Dade County Miami Canvassing Board has
had enough. They cannot possibly complete the recount by the deadline set
by the Florida Supreme Court so they unanimously voted to stop counting
... and did.
The Democrats are now suing to force them
to keep counting.
Meanwhile, the DNC has sent a delegation of
to talk to the Dade County Canvassing Board.
The Florida Supreme Court rejected the move by Gore lawyers to force
Dade County to continue recounting.
Big deal. They know a recount cannot be completed by their arbitrarily
selected completion date.
So, ..... this is a little PR move to make the Florida Supreme Court
to be "fair".
the Ballot used in
too confusing. He has
the following Ballot
a re-do of that vote.
thinks all seniors will
For Elderly Floridians
- - - - - - - - B
- - - - - - - - G
- - - - - - - - N 36
- - - - - - B 10
Do you really believe that thousands of Palm Beach County voters independently
Wexler to cry about the fact that they might have been confused by
the layout of the ballot?
Is your Representative in Congress the first person you
call when you have a problem? I think not.
The Democrats hired a Texas telemarketing firm to call all Democrats
who voted in the election and ask if they think they might have been confused
by the ballot. .......If so call this number (Representative
Thousands of loyal party members did just that.
Come on. Who are you Dems kidding anyway?
These Ballots still are rolling in. Now our New New York Senator
as her first order of business wants to abolish the electrical [sic] college.
Notice the similarity to what Is Is.
Unless this thing flip flops again i.e. Bush gains the popular and Gore
gets the electricians. If this turns out to be the case she
wants to leave it the way it is.
We give equal time around here. This was sent to
me by a liberal Democrat
reflecting his perception of the Palm
Beach County ballot.
To me this is an admission that the Democrats in Palm Beach County could
not find their butts with both
hands if their pants were on fire. ( And Gore has had his pants on
fire more than once this campaign. ;-)
Please vote carefully.
If your circle touches the picture
of another candidate,
your vote will be rejected.
This is what a circle looks like.
Once more Black
has become White.
Up has become
The Left is
Keeping Pregnant Ballots Alive ?
The Right is
Being Asked to Abort GI's Votes
After watching these grown-up-looking
people count dimples and pimples and listening to them say Gore or Bush,
I wonder if they realize how lucky they are. What if one of these candidates
had been named Cherdasenkoluanskiwald!
Guess Palm Beach County would have thrown in the towel about now. :-)
The Democrats care nothing about the rule of law.
It is all about the rule of lawyers. The team with the most lawyers
There are clear laws on the books in Florida, all of which are being
trampled by the Liberals.
Starting with the U.S.Constitution and running all the way down to
local ordinances. Liberals ignore any law they don't like and legislate
through judicial rulings of Liberal judges.
Their backup plan......
They are now lobbying duly elected Republican Electoral College Electors
to change their votes. They have even hired private eyes to look into the
backgrounds of Electors in hopes of finding something that can be used
to blackmail (my word, not theirs; theirs is "persuade") the Electors into
voting for Gore.
These are really nice guys.
Hey! .... I won the lottery !!!!
... Except that I marked the wrong holes on the
card, but I meant to mark the right holes not the
wrong holes, so can I please have another card to
mark and this time I will try real hard to mark the
right holes, just like I tried to do the first time
when my glasses fogged up due to the faulty heating
system and besides the little pencil wasn't sharpened
properly, and somebody bumped my arm.
Don't make me call Jessie Jackson about this....
And speaking of Jesse Jackson ........
Why did HE go charging down to Florida?
To organize demonstrations demanding that the Electoral College grant
more scholarships for minorities.
If there was ever
any doubt in your minds,
the center of the universe.
I THOUGHT THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE TODAY WAS TALLAHASSEE.
I THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY THAT ALL THE "HIGH POWERED" PEOPLE -
DEMOCRATS, REPUBLICANS AND THE MEDIA HAD TO GET OUT OF THEIR
ROOMS BECAUSE OF THE FOOTBALL GAME. NOW THEY KNOW WHAT IS
MOST IMPORTANT THIS WEEKEND IN FLORIDA. NOT THEIR ENDLESS
TALKING!!!! (SOME COULD NOT BELIEVE THEY WERE ASKED TO LEAVE.)
The Office of Personnel Management for the United States government
today announced the 2001 holiday schedule for federal employees.
There will be two fewer holidays in Washington D.C. next year.
Halloween and Thanksgiving have been cancelled.
The witch is moving to New York and she's taking the turkey with her.
At one Florida precinct, a bus load of mentally challenged people was
in to vote. The person in charge of the group lined them up, checked
them in, and
accompanied them, one by one, into a voting booth where he "assisted"
in casting their votes. One of the voters came out of the booth shouting,
I voted, I voted, I voted." She then turned to the person who
"assisted" her and
shouted, "Who did I vote for?"
The bus had Gore-Lieberman stickers all over it.
The Democrats running things in Florida have
sent a five page memo to
the Dems on canvassing boards throughout the
the state instructing them on
how to disallow the absentee ballots from
servicemen overseas. The man who
wants so badly to be their Commander in Chief
is trying desperately to
disenfranchise the brave men and women honorably
serving our country around
G.I.s Screwed Again !!!
Lets say you are a on board a Navy ship and
want to mail your absentee ballot. You follow all the rules, get your ballot
witnessed, date it, and mail it before election day. A helicopter picks
it up and it ends up being delivered without
a postmark. Tough luck fella, the Democrats will follow the LETTER of the
law and your vote will be thrown out.
Ok, you are on a ship that, for whatever reason,
does not get its mail picked up but you will be in port in a few days.
When your ship docks, the ballots are mailed and the postal service puts
a post mark on your ballot, but it is after election day. Tough luck sailor,
this one will be thrown out, too, because it has
One rejected because because it doesn't have
a postmark and the other because it does. These are matters over which
you have no control.
The Dems are very concerned about the intent
the voters in three Florida counties, bending over backwards over "dimples"
and "zits" and "hanging and pregnant chads" and pin pricks, but they care
nothing for your right to vote and the
of your ballot. They have rejected your ballot out of
hand on any technicality.
Remember how the Democrats treated your sacred
right to vote the next time you send in your ballot.
Vote the scoundrels out.
Thanks Al and Joe,
The service men and women who put our lives on the line every day for
In the face of public opinion, Gore and Lieberman are now paying
lip service to letting absentee ballots from our men and women in uniform
count. BUT in every Florida county there is a team of lawyers trying their
damndest to block every service absentee ballot on every conceivable technicality.
Who is kidding who, here?
My husband fought in WWII and his outfit liberated a concentration camp.
If he were still overseas, I wonder if Senator Lieberman and the many
of these three counties who were liberated by him and his comrades
would want to deny
him the right to vote.
What a stupid thought. Of course they would.
And Clinton does
his part to disenfranchise the military.
It is not just absentee ballots from overseas
Bill Clinton, in a blatant attempt to aid
Al Gore, banned polling places from all stateside military bases to make
it as inconvenient as possible for our military to vote.
Hey, you GI guys and gals, Remember this
the next time you go to the polls.
With numerous allegations of voting
irregularities surfacing in the state, People For
the American Way has sent a delegation of its
leaders to Florida. Led by PFAW President
Ralph G. Neas and Vice President and
General Counsel Elliot Mincberg, the PFAW
delegation will be based out of the
organization's Florida regional office in Miami.
Just what Florida
needs right now. . .
An invasion of
yet another gang of
agenda, a re-vote,
coming down to
stir up trouble.
It is not voting
it is counting
that are the problem down here.
Voting is not about rights: it is about
If you are so stupid that you cannot
align a person with a hole,
you should not be allowed to vote
... or have sex.
This Florida Ballot Recount Reminds Me Of A School Budget Vote.
If It Is Voted Down.
They Bring It Up Again And Again For Revote Until They Get Their Desired
Then We Hear No More About Voting Again!
We, the people of Florida, are holding this election hostage.
When you, the people of the US, promise to stop sending us all
people, we will release your election.
The Carolina Gamecocks, after consulting with the Democratic National
Committee, have demanded a rematch with the Florida Gators because the
score this evening (Gators 41 Gamecocks 21) was too close. There are also
several complaints that the playing field was too difficult to understand,
with there being goals at BOTH ends of the stadium. They believe that some
of the touchdowns scored by Florida were really meant for them, but the
Gators got confused and chose the wrong end.
The Reverend Jesse Jackson is headed for Gainesville to represent the
2nd string players who claim they did not get the right to play because
they were turned away by their coaches. A demonstration is scheduled for
Al Gore, representing the Gamecocks, has asked the game be extended
by another hour or so or until such time as the Gamecocks score is higher
than the Gators.
"This is the will of the people," Gore stated, "It is only fair that
we play this game until it comes to its completion. It should be a slow
and unrushed process. The Gators should not be in such a hurry to claim
The media apologizes for their part in this mess. In the first quarter
of the game, they proclaimed Carolina to be the winner. A spokesman for
the media said,"Competition was fierce to become the first to predict the
outcome ....all the indications were that the Gamecocks would carry Florida,
but at that time I guess it was too close to call."
Bottom line......... we may not know the outcome of the Carolina vs
Florida game for days, maybe even weeks. This may delay bowl games
across America maybe even into next year.
It may seem bizarre but I, for one, am proud to live in a country that
lets you change the rules and the outcome until they are the "Will
of the People"....... aren't you?
And in the same vein:
NEW YORK --The New York Mets announced today that they are going to
court to get an additional inning added to the end of Game 5 of the
The batting, pitching, and bench coaches for the Mets held a press
conference earlier today. They were joined by members of the Major
"We meant to hit those pitches from the Yankee pitchers," said the
batting coach. "We were confused by the irregularities of the pitches
received and believe we have been denied our right to hit."
One claim specifically noted that a small percentage of the Mets batters
had intended to swing at fast balls, but actually swung at curve balls.
was clear that these batters never intended to swing at curve balls,
though a much
higher percentage were not confused by the pitches.
Reporters at the press conference pointed out that the Mets had extensively
reviewed film of the Yankees pitchers prior to the World Series and
had in fact
faced the Yankees in inter-league play earlier in the year.
"The fact remains that some of the pitches confused us and denied us
our right to hit," said the Mets batting coach. "The World Series is
over yet and the Yankees are celebrating prematurely."
Major League Baseball has reviewed the telecast of all the World Series
games and recounted the balls and strikes called by the umpires of
"While some of the strikes called against the Mets were, in fact, balls,
were not enough of them to change the outcome of the World Series,"
Another portion of the Mets legal claim stated that, based on on-base
percentage, the Mets had actually won the World Series, regardless
the final scores of the games. "It's clear that we were slightly on-base
often than the Yankees," said a Mets spokesman. "The World Series crown
The manager of the Mets has remained in relative seclusion, engaging
light jogging for exercise. He has stated that he believes "we need
to let the
process run its course without a rush to judgment."
Give Me One More Recount
OXYMORON OF THE WEEK:
HONEST-HAND-COUNT IN PALM BEACH
I resent the way the media portrays Florida as a state full of boobs
who don't know how to count.
Haven't they noticed that the counties having so much trouble recanvassing
the vote are bursting at the seams with transplants from "enlightened"
northern states? More than 60 counties, populated primarily by native Floridians,
had no trouble at all with expeditiously completing the second count mandated
by law and found very few errors.
Who are the boobs here?
JUST OFF THE PRESSES
(AND AVAILABLE IN WALMART, K-MART, BARNES AND NOBLE,
AND WALDEN BOOKS IN PALM BEACH COUNTY)
REQUIRED READING BEFORE
An Open Letter from Florida to the rest of the country:
OK, here's the deal. We in Florida have gotten together and decided
hold the rest of the country hostage with these election results until
you come and take your parents back home with you! That's right,
tired of hearing how good it was back home and how beautiful your children
We can't stand it any longer! And where did they learn to DRIVE?????
We're running out of Depends down here and it's gonna get messy.
want a president...WE want the speed limit over 20 mph.....Is it a
George W, you listening? How about you, Al baby... Ya gettin
this? We mean
it, we're not lettin the results out, we'll stall with lawsuits and
claim ballot fraud.
Anything, until you come and take these old farts outta here!
Greg B. (PS: I voted 1787 times in Dade County, but
I only used my real name
976 times, so I'll never get caught!)
Wondering why the Florida Supreme Court can't rule until Monday? Football,
The Seminoles and Gators make their hotel reservations a year in advance
for this game. All those poor
hacks from the media and all those carpetbagger out-of-state lawyers
and union mischief makers,
and others who should be keeping their noses out of Florida's business,
are being bumped out of their
hotel rooms to satisfy football fans who have confirmed reservations.
(My heart bleeds for them.)
So, the nation will just have to wait .......
Because this is FOOTBALL country.
Latest Manicure Fad in Palm Beach County
My husband and I are open minded
Jewish Liberals and don't want to read any of this trash. Please take us
off your mailing list.
(Gosh, this poor henpecked guy ....... his wife even intercepts and
reads his E-mail.....and ONE of them, probably her,
must have clicked on this website. She may rot in Liberal hell for that
Palm Beach County
You are X. Its your turn.
You must get two out
of three correct to qualify to vote.
Another Proposed New Ballot for Palm Beach County
Well MSNBC, CBS,ABC, NBC,
CNN, Et Al, Media's. You still have a chance to win for Gore.
Before 5 PM.
FOR A HURRICANE !!
(But, you may not have much credit
up there to draw on.)
It all reminds me of a soap opera
-where every day rehashes the old and adds a new tidbit.
The hell with it all. I'm off
to New Orleans to spend a couple of days at the Stephen Ambrose D Day Museum
- and relive in memory a time when patriotism, honor, and integrity meant
something in the good old USA.
(Well, they sure don't count for much in three Florida counties or in
the Florida Supreme Court.)
NOTICE OF REVOCATION OF INDEPENDENCE
To the citizens of the United States of America,
In the light of your failure to elect a President of
the USA and thus to
govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation
independence, effective today.
Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume
over all states, commonwealths and other territories.
Except Utah, which she
does not fancy. Your new prime minister (The rt. hon.
Tony Blair, MP for
the 97.85% of you who have until now been unaware that
there is a world
outside your borders) will appoint a minister for America
without the need
for further elections. The House of Representatives
and the Senate will be
A questionnaire will be circulated next year to determine
whether any of you
To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency,
the following rules
are introduced with immediate effect:
1. You should look up "revocation" in the Oxford English
look up "aluminium". Check the pronunciation guide.
You will be amazed at
just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it. Generally,
you should raise
your vocabulary to acceptable levels. Look up "vocabulary".
Using the same
twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises
such as "like" and "you
know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication.
2. There is no such thing as "US English". We will let
Microsoft know on
3. You should learn to distinguish the English and Australian
really isn't that hard.
4. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English
actors as the
5. You should relearn your original national anthem,
"God Save The Queen",
but only after fully carrying out task 1. We would
not want you to get
confused and give up half way through.
6. You should stop playing American "football". There
is only one kind of
football. What you refer to as American "football"
is not a very good game.
The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world
outside your borders
may have noticed that no one else plays "American" football.
You will no
longer be allowed to play it, and should instead play
Initially, it would be best if you played with the
girls. It is a difficult
game. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed
to play rugby
(which is similar to American "football", but does
not involve stopping
for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full
kevlar body armour like
nancies). We are hoping to get together at least a
US rugby sevens side by
7. You should declare war on Quebec and France, using
nuclear weapons if
they give you any merde. The 98.85% of you who were
not aware that there
is a world outside your borders should count yourselves
lucky. The Russians
have never been the bad guys.
8. July 4th is no longer a public holiday. November
8th will be a new
national holiday, but only in England. It will be called
9. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap
and it is for your
own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand
what we mean.
10. Please tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving
Thank you for your cooperation.
We, the State of Florida, would like to apologize for not being able
to count. We knew our schools were lagging behind the rest of the nation,
but we never knew just how badly things were here. Maybe it's from all
that pesticide we use to control those giant palmetto bugs. Maybe its from
too many margaritas and too much Jimmy Buffet. Maybe, just maybe, the glorious
Florida sun has baked our brains just a little too much. And maybe all
you yankees who have moved down here are not a smart as you make out to
be. Maybe you can't count either.
We also want to apologize that even after hundreds of years of voting,
we are not aware of the fact that we can only pick ONE Presidential candidate
and not two.
Some of us thought down here in the Sunshine state that we could pick
a first choice and then a second choice. Kinda like when we vote for our
favorite Disney character.
Again, sincere apologies, we have our abacus' out and we are starting
over and we swear we will get it right this time.
The Citizens of the State of Florida
This is a letter I sent to MSNBC this morning. If you didn't
the Dems are trying to steal votes, you should have heard this guy.
have accepted Gore last Tuesday, but no longer..........
I was watching your morning discussion segment when the
moderator read a part of a Los Angeles Times article on
how Democrats were instructing their people on how to
look for "dimpled or scratched chads" that would
favor AL Gore and "keep your mouth shut" when
they saw the same marks on a Bush chad. When asked about
this, one of the democrats made the comment that this was
a "perfectly acceptable strategy". I hope I'm
not alone in thinking that this is one of the most
un-American statements I've ever heard in my life and
smacks of Communist rhetoric.
These people just don't get it. As an American
serviceman, I expect that the votes should show what the
citizens of this country want, and it makes me sick to
think that these people are only interested in the rights
of those that voted for their candidate.
(Name of active duty Naval Commander withheld)
Lets not lose track of Bill and Hill. With
all of the hullabaloo over the sleazy tactics of Bill's co-perpetrator
Al Gore in trying to circumvent the Florida election laws with vote count
after vote count. Bill is in North Viet Nam, (where the American flag is
being displayed in a position inferior to the North Viet Nam flag), accepting
praise and accolades for opposing the war, draft dodging to Oxford, and
organizing Anti-US demonstrations while there. They love him over there
in Nam. Hope you Viet Nam vets are taking notice. Hill has flown in, too
(at our expense) to enjoy the festivities. We can only hope
they decide to stay there ...... forever.
Bill Posing for a Picture With
Yet Another Ho.
Per a sworn affidavit, one of the Democrat election officials was seen
How could he do that?
Gee, what do they taste like? Chicken ? Naw.
The Democrats want to change the rules AGAIN and count "pregnant" and
"dimpled" chads as votes.
These can be given only one honest interpretation. A voter said "OOPS!
I almost voted for the wrong person," and then punched out
the chad for the candidate of his choice. If they are truly trying to interpret
intent of the voter, a dimple should be read as a rejection
of a candidate, not a vote for him.
They're just waiting for an excuse.
If you were wondering,
that is why the Judiciary usually just interprets
laws but doesn't
And now they have caught a Democrat slipping Bush Ballot Cards
under the door to an accomplice who was making off with them. Sounds like
a desperation move to me. Since this was just one of perhaps many, how
will they know the actual true count (as if there is such a thing in south
Gore Plans to Fund the Military,
The Lawyers' Corner
The present situation
has prompted the revival of lawyer jokes. Here are some from this week's
Did you hear about the new sushi bar that
caters exclusively to lawyers?
It's called, Sosumi.
Did you hear that the Post Office just
recalled their latest stamps?
They had pictures of lawyers on them...and
people couldn't figure out
which side to spit on.
How are an orange and a lawyer alike?
They both look good hanging from a tree.
How many lawyer jokes are there?
Only three. The rest are true stories.
If a lawyer and an IRS agent were both
drowning, and you could only save
one of them would you go to lunch or read
What did the terrorist that hijacked a
jumbo-jet full of lawyers do? He
threatened to release one every hour if
his demands were not met.
What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have
in common? They are both
What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?
A round of Skeet.
What do you call a lawyer gone bad?
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of
50? Your Honor.
What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?
What does a lawyer get when you give him
What's black and brown and looks good on
a lawyer? A Doberman.
What's the difference between a lawyer
and a liar? The pronunciation.
What's the difference between a lawyer
and a prostitute? The prostitute
stops screwing you after you are dead.
What's the difference between a lawyer
and a vulture? The lawyer gets
frequent flyer miles.
What's the difference between a mosquito
and a lawyer? One is a
blood-sucking parasite, the other is an
Where can you find a good lawyer?
The nearest cemetery.
Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?
Why does California have the most lawyers
in the country, and New Jersey
have the most toxic waste sites?
New Jersey got first choice.
How many sneaky, slimy, disreputable carpetbagger
lawyers are there now in
The Democratic Canvassing Board locks itself into a room and attempts
to count in secret.
The incensed Republicans pound on the doors and demand that the counting
be done in full view of the public. In a city that has seen one Democratic
demonstration after another, the Republicans, who have had it with the
sleazy tactics of the Democrats, also take to the streets and demonstrated
Wow! Stealing some Democratic thunder.!!!! Its unfair, the Republicans
Do you believe the audacity of Joe Lieberman, waggling his finger at
us, Clinton style, characterizing this activity as a Republican mob of
thugs, and saying the poor Canvassing Board was so intimidated that they
stopped counting?.........and that's why they can't finish counting by
The sheer AUDACITY!!! They have absolutely no shame.
Doctor Seuss Goes To Florida
Can we count them with our nose?
Can we count them with our toes?
Should we count them with a band?
Should we count them all by hand?
If I do not like the count,
I will simply throw them out!
I will not let this vote count stand
I do not like them, AL GORE I am!
Can we change these numbers here?
Can we change them, calm my fears?
What do you mean, Dubya has won?
This is not fair, this is not fun
Let's count them upside down this time
Let's count until the state is mine!
I will not let this VOTE count stand!
I do not like it, AL GORE I am!
I'm really ticked, I'm in a snit!
You have not heard the last of it!
I'll count the ballots one by one
And hold each one up to the sun!
I'll count, recount, and count some more!
You'll grow to hate this little chore
But I will not, cannot let this vote count stand!
I do not like it, AL GORE I am!
I won't leave office, I'm stayin' here!
I've glued my desk chair to my rear!
Tipper, Hillary, and Bubba too,
All telling me that I should sue!
We find the Electoral College vile!
RECOUNT the votes until I smile!
We do not want this vote to stand!
We do not like it, AL GORE I am!
How shall we count this ballot box?
Let's count it standing in our socks!
Shall we count this one in a tree?
And who shall count it, you or me?
We cannot, cannot count enough!
We must not stop, we must be tough!
I do not want this vote to stand!
I do not like it, AL GORE I am!
What's that? What? What are you trying to say?
You think the current count should stay?
You do not like my counting scheme?
It makes you tense, gives you bad dreams?
Foolish people, you're wrong you'll see!
Your only care should be for me!
I Will not let this vote count stand!
I do not like it, and AL GORE I am!
This column by Wall Street Journalist Peggy Noonan says it all. A Great
You probably can't put up the entire article but thought you would
Well, you are WRONG . Here it is, .....all of it........ and thanks.
Now we must fight for our country.
BY PEGGY NOONAN
Friday, November 24, 2000 12:01 a.m. EST
We must fight. And we all know it. And it's fine.
We like to complain, those of us of a certain age, that history has
never given us the gaudy challenges it gave our parents and
grandparents. But we've had our traumas, and from the time we
were children: assassinations, riots, Vietnam, Watergate, the
ayatollah, a stuck economy, the fall of the wall. We've had our
And now we face a great trial.
And we're up to it.
So let's go.
There was a national election on Tuesday, Nov. 7. The presidential
race was close, and would be decided by the state of Florida. The
state's votes were counted. At the end it was close, but George W.
A statewide recount was immediately and appropriately called. At
the end it was close, but Mr. Bush won.
But the higher reaches of the Democratic Party had a game plan for
what to do in case of a close vote in a key state, and their machine
went into motion while Republicans slept. Even before the recount
was over the outcome was contested.
On the afternoon of Election Day a Texas telemarketing firm is
hired to call Democratic voters in Palm Beach County and gin up a
protest. They had been disenfranchised. By Wednesday there are
charges that a "butterfly" ballot, designed and approved by
Democrats and published to no protest in the press, was confusing
and thus unfair.
Jesse Jackson is dispatched to Florida, where he charges that
Holocaust survivors have been denied a voice. Elderly widows
announce they never meant to vote for anyone but Al Gore. An
army of Democratic lawyers, political operatives and union members
is dispatched; they land in Florida and fan out, immediately
assisting in demands for a hand count. Gore campaign manager
Donna Brazile announces blacks were kept from the polls with racial
harassment and, when that wasn't enough, dogs.
Three Democratic counties in Florida announce they will
hand-count. But the rules of the hand count change and change
The Florida secretary of state, a Republican elected official, calls a
halt. She notes that hand counts are called only when there have
been charges of broken machines or vote fraud. Fraud and
breakdown were not charged, and did not in fact occur. She says
she will certify the election's outcome based on the original vote
count and the recount that followed, plus overseas absentee
ballots. Mr. Bush will be the victor.
She is immediately smeared by Democratic operatives and in the
press. She is a political "hack," a "Stalinist," a "commissar"; she is
vamp, a lackey. The Washington Post, a great newspaper,
publishes this description of Mrs. Harris: "Her lips were overdrawn
with berry-red lipstick--the creamy sort that smears all over a
coffee cup and leaves smudges on a shirt collar. Her skin had been
plastered and powdered to the texture of pre-war walls in need of
a skim coat. And her eyes, rimmed in liner and frosted with blue
shadow, bore the telltale homogeneous spikes of false eyelashes.
Caterpillars seemed to rise and fall with every bat of her eyelid, with
every downward glance to double check--before reading--her latest
'determination.' " Her mouth is "set in a jagged line." She has
"applied her makeup with a trowel." "One wonders how this
Republican woman, who can't even use restraint when she's
wielding a mascara wand, will manage to . . . make sound
At the same time the Democratic operative Paul Begala writes his
now-famous essay suggesting Republican candidates draw their
political strength from murderers, sadists, racists and the killers of
Soon a Democratic operative in Washington is revealed to be
gathering information on electors who will vote for Mr. Bush in the
Electoral College. Why? To use the information to pressure them to
vote Mr. Gore's way. It would be surprising to hear that the
famous Democratic Party private eyes are not on the electors' trail.
The mainstream press, watching, thinking and facing deadlines,
issues its conclusion: Conservatives are guilty of inflammatory
rhetoric. Those columnists, writers and public figures who have
come forward to oppose what they see as an attempt by
Clinton-Gore operatives to steal the 2000 presidential election are
denounced as hotheaded and extreme, dismissed as partisan.
The hand counting continues. From the first it is completely open
to mischief. In walks mischief.
Ballots for Mr. Bush are put in Gore piles. Scads of chads on the
floor. Vote counters can count a partly removed chad, and then an
almost-removed chad, and then a mark, a dimple, an indentation, a
"pregnancy." Standards are announced, altered, announced and
altered again. Questionable ballots are decided by
Democratic-dominated canvassing boards.
Sworn statements under oath begin to emerge: Ballots are found
with taped chads; ballots are sabotaged, used as fans, found
bearing Post-It Notes, dropped, misplaced. Eyewitnesses say there
is clear and compelling evidence of distorting, reinventing,
miscounting votes. The vote counters--many exhausted and
elderly, some state workers dragged off lawnmowers, work 7 a.m.
to 10 p.m. shifts in badly lit rooms. A woman from Broward County
whose husband is helping the recount writes, "He said it's also
frustrating because what we are seeing on the news is quite a bit
different from what is actually going on, little chads everywhere and
they have no idea where they are coming from."
From the Associated Press, Nov. 18, datelined Palm Beach: "On
Saturday [one vote counter] whispered in a pool reporter's ear as
she was leaving [the hand-counting room], "I've had it. I'm not
coming back. There are some real games going on in here."
And not only in there. From the Miami Herald, Nov. 18: "At least 39
felons--mostly Democrats--illegally cast absentee ballots in
Broward and Miami-Dade counties. . . . Their convictions range
from murder and rape to drunk driving. One is in the state's
registry of sexual offenders."
In the first two weeks there is not a single charge of Republican
mischief in the counting rooms. Not a single person comes forward
to charge that a Republican has done a single thing that is
dubious, untoward or wrong.
How could this be? With hundreds of people making thousands of
decisions, is it possible no Democrat would even make up a charge
that some Republican had done something wrong? One can't help
but infer that Democratic discipline is, as usual, operative. If they
add to the charges of corruption, a fair-minded judge might say:
Then we must protect both sides and stop the hand counting. But
if they stop the hand counting, Democrats will not be able to find
930 votes for Al Gore. And 930 is what he needs.
So no Democratic charges of corruption are leveled or dreamed up.
There is no evidence that the absentee ballots of felons have been
But the absentee ballots of members of the military were
challenged. Many were thrown out.
In the most shameful and painful act of the hand counts, the
Democrats on the ground, and their operators from the
Democratic National Committee and the state organization and the
Gore campaign, deliberately and systematically scrutinized for
challenge every military absentee ballot, and knocked out as many
as they could on whatever technicality they could find or even
Reports begin to filter out. The Democratic army of lawyers and
operatives marches into the counting room armed with a five-page
memo from a Democratic lawyer, instructing them on how to
disfranchise military voters. The lawyers and operatives unspool
reams of computer printouts bearing the names and party
affiliation of military voters. Those who are Republicans are subject
to particular and seemingly relentless scrutiny. Right down to
signatures on ballots being compared with signatures on
registration cards. A ballot bearing a domestic postmark because a
soldier had voted, sent his ballot home to his parents and asked
them to mail it in on time, is thrown out. A ballot that comes with a
note from an officer explaining his ship was not able to postmark
his ballot, but that he had voted on time--and indeed it had arrived
in time--is thrown out, because it has no postmark.
The Democratic operatives are ruthless, focused. As one witness
says, "They had a clear agenda."
Received late Wednesday, an e-mail forwarded from a Republican
who witnessed the counting of the Brevard County overseas
It is 11:30 PM (Tuesday) and I have just returned from
the count of absentee ballots, that started at 4PM. Gore
had five attorneys there, the sole objective was to
disenfranchise the military absentee voter. . . . They
challenged each and every vote. Their sole intent was to
disqualify each and every absentee voter. They
constantly challenged military votes that were clearly
legitimate, but they were able to disqualify them on a
technicality. I have never been so frustrated in all my life
as I was to see these people fight to prevent our active
duty Military from voting. They succeeded in a number
of cases denying the vote to these fine Men and
This was a deliberate all out assault on the Armed
Forces solely to sustain the Draft Dodger and his
flunky. These people must have a hard time looking at
themselves in a mirror. . . . They denied a number of
votes postmarked Queens NY, ballots that were clearly
ordered from overseas, clearly returned from overseas,
and verified by the Post Office that DOD uses the
Queens post office to handle overseas mail, were denied
because it didn't say APO, They denied military votes
postmarked out of Jacksonville, Knowing full well it came
from ships at sea and was flown into Jacksonville . . . .
This is what you can expect from a Gore administration
a further trampling on the Military and more trampling
on your rights. . . .
The attorneys there treated it all as a joke, and when
my wife protested their actions she was told she didn't
Television both reports the story of what is happening in the
vote-counting rooms and doesn't report it. There are comic pieces
and sidebars: "Amazing as it seems, Bernie, there's actually a
charge that one of the Democratic counters has eaten a chad!"
But 16 days into the drama there has not been a single serious,
extended and deeply reported piece on network television
investigating the charges comprehensively. No "60 Minutes," no
"Dateline," no "20/20." No extended look at charges of vote
tampering, no first-person interviews with eyewitnesses who saw
the Democratic operatives go after and throw out the military
Television does, however, report "extraordinary anger among
Republicans." Ed Rollins says "partisan Republicans" are very angry
about this. Bill Schneider on CNN says he's never seen Republicans
in Washington "so angry." They muse about "the big question":
Will these Republicans ever accept the legitimacy of a Mr. Gore if he
Oddly enough Republicans do not think that's the big question.
Can the Democrats steal this election is the question.
Why is mainstream television (not the talk shows, not Sean and
Alan, not "Crossfire," but the mainstream news shows) missing
this story, underreporting it?
It would be taking sides.
It would be partisan.
It would be extreme.
But there is more. We have all noticed the ideological evolution of
media in our time. Television is liberal, establishment-oriented, and
does what it does: It entertains. Shut out of television and eager
for news, conservatives have turned in the past 20 years to radio.
And so now radio is conservative, and full of uproar. The Internet
too is conservative, and full of information, of samizdat.
But television, the elite media, the great broadsheet newspapers,
and the clever people who talk loudly on television--that is, the
powers that be, the forces that are--day by day appear through
action and inaction, through an inability to see and a refusal to see,
to be (a) allowing the stealing of an election in Florida, and (b)
subtly taking out the critics of this hijacking.
What are we to do?
In 1939, during parliamentary debate on the coming war in Europe,
Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain finished another of his hopeful,
frightened speeches about making peace with Hitler. The Labour
member of Parliament Arthur Greenwood rose to speak in
opposition. As he did, the voice of a Tory parliamentarian pierced
the chamber. "Speak for England, Arthur!" he called. At that the
chamber exploded, and Chamberlain realized that further
appeasement was intolerable.
We are all of us, one way or another, in the Greenwood position.
And we must speak not as members of a party but as members of
a nation--the great and fabled one that has been, through our
lives, the hope of the world.
The Florida Supreme Court, known for its liberal activism,
consisting of six Democrats, one independent and no Republicans,
ruled that Mrs. Harris must include in the certified Florida results
the final tallies from the corrupted hand counts.
Gov. Bush will fight in the courts and perhaps in the state
Legislature. "Make no mistake," he said Wednesday in responding
to the justices in Tallahassee, "the court rewrote the law. It
changed the rules, and it did so after the election was over."
And we must fight, too.
We must first of all know this will not be over soon. We must be in
it for the long haul and must fight in any peaceful and legal way
open to us.
Yesterday we rested and thought and spent time with our families
and thanked God for all he has given us. Today we must return to
the trenches, refreshed and ready.
Ideas, all modest and obvious, and yours will be better:
Every Republican senator and congressman, every governor and
state legislator should starting now come forward and pledge his
opposition to the Gore attempt to steal the election. They should
be all over the local airwaves back home, making the case against
the dishonesty that is occurring. They might point out that most
thieves have enough respect to rob a house when it is empty, but
in this case the thieves are stealing while the country is home, and
Every writer, scribbler, Internet Paul Revere, talker, pundit, thinker,
essayist, voice: Come forward and speak the truth. Howl it.
We must point out what needs be pointed out again and again and
not ducked or hidden: The Clinton-Gore operatives are trying to
steal the election--and it is wrong. The Democrats in their hunger
for power will throw the men and women who protect us with their
lives over the side--and it is wrong.
We must keep our arguments sharp. The other night Alan Colmes
challenged Newt Gingrich: Do you really think it fair to charge the
Democratic Party with trying to suppress military votes? Mr.
Gingrich replied that you can see the Democratic plan in this: They
issued a five-page memo on how to knock out military votes, which
they assume lean Republican. There was no five-page memo on
how to throw out the absentee ballots from Israel, which they
assume lean Democratic.
Ever since this exchange I haven't heard anyone ask if the
Democrats really mean to be doing what they're doing.
We must accept that the venue of the fight will change and change
again. This all may be decided by the Florida Legislature. Or the
U.S. Supreme Court. Or in Congress. When venues change you
must be nimble.
We must be prepared, and learn all we can, and know all we can,
and spread the word.
We must accept too that in spite of being spoofed and put down
and accused of being extreme, it is not wrong to fight in this case,
it is right. It is not irresponsible--it is the only way of being
It is wrong to yell "Fire!" for the fun of upsetting your neighbors. It
is right to yell "Fire!" when your neighbor's house is in flames.
We must through e-mail and telephone calls and call-ins to radio
and television report all of the data we are receiving, all of the
evidence that the theft of an election is taking place day by day in
Florida. Those on the ground in Florida, in the counting rooms,
must even more become part of this. The one thing history needs
more of--and the courts need, too--is first-person testimony.
Some have suggested a march. I don't know if that's a good idea,
but it should be discussed, and soon. Perhaps a march on
Washington, perhaps millions, perhaps dressed in black--in
mourning for an attempt to subvert democracy. I suppose it would
look like a huge New York dinner party, but it would also look like a
people resisting. Perhaps they should march silently, past symbols
of democracy that are more eloquent in their silence than we with
our sound. Perhaps there should be placards with the names of
men and women from military bases whose attempt to vote for
their commander in chief has been denied.
Lawn signs. E-mail chains spreading word of what is happening in
the counting and the deliberating. Calls to political leaders, to local
newspapers, to radio and television, registering our dismay and
It must of course remain peaceful--peaceful protest, passive
resistance, voices strong, clear and modulated. We don't support
breaking laws--we support upholding the law.
And of course, in some part of our minds we must look to the
future. To legislation that will normalize and regularize our voting
procedures, make clear and just its rules and regulations, see to it
that a Florida will never happen again.
A new modesty seems in order. We Americans like to brag about
how this oldest and greatest democracy can always teach the
other, little countries how to perform. We've been braying and
sending our vote counters to less secure republics for years. The
cocktail parties of the world are now having fun at our expense.
They should. A modest bow from us seems in order.
And this idea, from a conservative activist. In January President
Bush, as his first act in office, should announce that he will give a
complete pardon to anyone who goes down to the FBI within 30
days and swears out a confession of his involvement in vote fraud
and vote tampering in the 2000 elections. It's harder to spin
history when history has the affidavits.
And of course we must all pray. I say this more than I do it, and
not many of us have done it enough, which is the reason this
happened. Prayer can move mountains; it could have redirected Al
Gore's ferocity and need, too. Prayer--simply talking to God--is the
one thing without which we lose.
And after praying, consider this. There is now all over the Internet
a quote attributed to Stalin that for so many sums up the Florida
story: "It doesn't matter who votes, it only matters who count the
True enough at the moment. But I prefer the last words of a more
likable lefty, Joe Hill of the Industrial Workers of the World: "Don't
Ms. Noonan is a contributing editor of The Wall Street Journal and
author of "The Case Against Hillary Clinton" (Regan Books, 2000).
Her column appears Fridays.
This is probably too long to post but it makes its point very well.
It is from the December 1st Wall Street Journal.
I agree and here is all of it. America is getting fed up with this charade.
The only way to keep the game honest is to toss out
Friday, December 1, 2000 12:01 a.m. EST
OK, belly up and ante up. The world's greatest democracy is going
to play Miami-Dade. The game works like this: We will deal 625,000
punched cards, and salted among them will be 10,000 unpunched
cards. When the pit boss sees an unpunched card, he can award it
to either player at his discretion. Over in the poker pits they have
deuces wild; here at the election table we have . . . dimples wild.
Watching the TV pictures of election counters poring over the
dimpled chad, it's been hard to stand back and recognize that the
whole process is preposterous, not to mention wholly illegitimate. If
a ballot is ambiguous, throw it out, stupid. In the case of punch
card votes, this means the ballot has to be recognizable to a
machine, as voters were instructed at the polls. How did we get to
the point of allocating ambiguous ballots on the basis of 2-1 votes
of the examiners?
Before November 7, dimples wild was not the rule in Palm Beach
County. One fact to emerge from the Florida proceedings is that in
1990, Theresa LePore, then Palm Beach County's chief deputy
elections supervisor, issued a counting guideline which said: "But a
chad that is fully attached bearing only an indentation should not
be counted as a vote."
Nor was it the rule in Broward County. Writing in The Wall Street
Journal Wednesday, Boyden Gray noted: "In a contest of a 1991
election in Broward County, a Florida court specifically recognized
that it was proper 'to defer to the count of the tabulation
equipment following proper calibration and testing,' rather than do
a manual recount where undervotes resulted from the failure of
voters to properly punch out chads."
Miami-Dade tried to hold on to the old way even after November 7;
it did a 1% recount, decided the machines were working and voted
to stop there. But Palm Beach voted to count the dimpled chad,
refusing Judge Burton's request for a ruling by the Secretary of
State, whose representative advised that recounts were not for the
purpose of weighing whether voters had made errors. Broward
also forged ahead, with the Republican examiner eventually
resigning. Miami-Dade momentarily changed its mind and started to
recount, but reverted to its earlier refusal when the Florida
Supreme Court established a difficult if not impossible deadline.
The dimple-counting itself was even more ridiculous than it looked
on TV. In Miami-Dade, the hunt wasn't just for dimples, but any
mark at all. If counter No. 1 felt the "intent" was for Gore, the
Democratic member simply confirmed it, producing a 2-1 vote for
the Vice President. A Presidential dimple was counted as a full vote
even if every other relevant chad on the card was punched clean
through. In this world "intent" is a one-way street.
This is the kind of mystical divination that the Florida election laws
were designed to avert. Dimples wild became the game the moment
the Florida Supreme Court enjoined Secretary of State Katherine
Harris from enforcing the deadlines established by state law to set
an orderly procedure for contested elections. The deadline was the
immediate issue, but the real issue was whether to delay
certification to allow time for hand recounts that Mrs. Harris said
were not justified under Florida law. The Florida Supreme Court
overruled her, providing the time for a round of dimples wild.
In the event, Governor Bush came out ahead even under
dimples-wild rules. The Democratic-dominated election boards
simply could not bring themselves to exercise their discretion
ruthlessly enough to suit the purpose of the Gore campaign. So
the Gore campaign is suing them. It urges Judge N. Sanders Sauls
to order more rounds with even more wild cards. Today, the
Supreme Court of the United States will hear arguments on
whether to overturn the Florida Supreme Court decision that set
the currently, if recently, prevailing rules.
At first blush the High Court case seems moot because the
changed rules did not change the outcome. But only to this point,
as the persistence of the Gore litigation shows. It is still not
beyond imagining that Al Gore will become President by virtue of
his lawyers and his dimpled chads.
The High Court, however, can go far toward getting to sensible
rules simply by saying that Mrs. Harris was right in the first place,
that a close election and the existence of some unallocated ballots
was no reason to delay the vote certification while election judges
distributed wild cards by divided vote.
This issue has significance far beyond the current mess in Florida.
The Supreme Court should put a stake through the idea of dimples
wild before it becomes a permanent blight on American democracy.
All it takes is perspective!!
Once there was a young teenage girl who was about to finish her first
year of college. She considered herself to be a very liberal Democrat
and her father was a rather staunch Republican.
Then one day as she was challenging her father on his beliefs and his
opposition to programs like welfare, he stopped her and asked her
how she was doing in school. She answered that she had a 4.0 GPA
but it was really tough. She had to study all the time, never had
time to go out and party and often went sleepless because all of
the studying. She didn't have time for a boyfriend and didn't really
have many college friends because of all her studying.
He then asked how her friend Mary, that was attending the same college,
was doing. She replied that she was barely getting by. She had a
2.0 GPA, and never studied. She was very popular on campus and was
parties all the time. She often wouldn't show up for classes because
she was hung over.
He then asked his daughter why she didn't go to the Dean's office and
ask why she couldn't take 1.0 off her 4.0 and give it to her friend that
only had a 2.0. That way they would both have a 3.0 GPA.
The daughter fired back and said "that wouldn't be fair, I worked really
hard for mine and my friend has done nothing". The father smiled
and said: "Welcome to the Republican Party".
Finally, to have some fun with this go to:
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